More radiotherapy

Was up at the Berks yesterday for the planning of my radiotherapy and then had the actual treatment today. Again, I had approximately 90 seconds (which I think is considered quite a large dose) to front and back of my right pelvis this time.

Possibly having the radiotherapy before christmas wasn't the best timing but I don't think there is going to be a good time and I would rather get it out of the way and hopefully get back to walking normally again. because this has caused me so many problems in other areas of my body as I just have aching muscles all over the place.

Carol Singing

My daughter Ellie and her friends wanted to do some carol singing to raise money for my Wigs to Wishes fund so for the last week Ellie has been downloading christmas carol lyrics and printing off song sheets for their little concert.

The girls set off at 6.30pm and visited many neighbouring roads. I think they all had fun along the way. The girls were really pleased with the response they had from people and would like to thank many for their generosity as would I because they managed to raise £150 in the two hours that they sang their carols.

I'd personally like to thank, my daughter Ellie, Ellie Burrows, Amber Taylor, Georgia Burrell, Olivia Morrin, Georgia Newman, Lizzi Gray, Lucy and Isobel Morrin. You must have sung beautifully.

Macmillan Nurse visit

My Macmillan nurse came out to see me today. I met Sylvia approximately 3 years ago when I was first diagnosed with secondaries but I suppose at that time didn't feel the need to see her on a regular basis. Today's meeting has come about at Dr Barrett's suggestion and I suppose initially it made me feel that I was giving up slightly but having had a good chat with Sylvia I think that I could benefit from her input.

We chatted about my current situation and the pain I've been suffering and also ways of getting around easier. Possibly a walking stick would be better than the crutches which I do still use occasionally even though I feel they cause me massive muscle problems previously.

Sylvia's suggested that I attend the Sue Ryder Hospice in Nettlebed for a consultation with the palliative doctor, physio and occupational therapist (5/1/09). I think we're just trying to find ways of making my life a little more comfortable because to be honest the last couple of months have been a nightmare!

Increased pain in right leg

I've had a terrible weekend which includes not moving far from my bed. It's getting so depressing and I feel so sorry for the kids and it is also putting a lot of stress on Steve. The pain in my right side is increasing and I just don't know what it is. I'm still not able to walk very well but this varies from one hour to the next. I'll have to try and see my GP tomorrow.

Nose Bleed

Since yesterday, I've been suffering with really bad nose bleeds, I think this may be connected to the reduced platelet count as I've been looking up low platelet counts on the internet and it suggests that nose bleeds are a common factor.

Also I've got a terrible pain in my left side underneath my left breast, it was on my list to mention to the Oncologist on Wednesday but didn't get round to it because of our depressing chat. I also didn't mention it to Germany either!

Festive Lunch

Another successful Festive Lunch in aid of "Wigs to Wishes" was held today. The lunch was attended by approximately 30 ladies, many of whom have supported this event in the past. It was nice to see everyone and it makes me feel so special that these ladies are supporting me.

It was a bit touch and go as to whether I would be attending the lunch due to the health problems I've had lately but I'm glad that I did as I had a wonderful time

As usual we enjoyed good food, fine wine and excellent service from our hosts, you wouldn't get this much attention to detail if it was held in a restaurant. I think we all want to book the girl's in for our Christmas Day lunch also!

I would like to thank, Renee Tyrell, Tracey Hart, Sue Darcy, Liz Hicks, Carly Burn, and Linda Pinker for their continued support and organising such a wonderful lunch and of course to those ladies who so kindly attended the lunch.

I would also like to thank contributors to the lunch including the generous wine donation from Andrew Brown of Ratcliffe and Brown, Waitrose for their £20 gift voucher and a bottle of Cava from the Majestic Wine Warehouse.

Contacted the Leonardis Klinik

Following my Oncology appointment this morning, I contacted the Leonardis Klinik. I needed some positive news and I spoke with Dr Draczynski at length. He agrees that I should have the radiotherapy and wonders whether this is just a small pocket of cancer that is not responding so well to the treatment.

When I mentioned the low platelets and neutrofils count following my blood test, Dr D asked whether I could be given something to boost the counts (I think he was talking about a drug called erythropoietin). Unfortunately this isn't usually available at the Berks because I'm sure I've asked about it before but I think I will ask again next time I visit to see what they say if the count is still low.

Oncology appointment - doom and gloom

Not a good day at the hospital. Saw Dr Barrett again and the news was not good. My blood count is really low therefore another round of chemo has been postponed. I explained to Dr Barret that I still have terrible problems walking and that although they gave me radiotherapy to my pelvis on the left side two weeks ago, the pain I'm currently experiencing (and was when I last spoke to her) is on my right. She has suggested another shot of radiotherapy to the right side to see if this will help.

I had to ask her what the implications are of this spread in the pelvis as I could understand if it was in the liver or lungs but I thought that it was not so serious if it were in the bones but Dr Barrett said it was just as serious because the bone marrow is contained in the bones and if it is compromised this is not good. She did go on to say that I do have a limited life but as I was on my own she asked me whether I wished her to continue with the conversation and I declined because I'm just not in a good place right now to hear the negative news. She believes that now is the time to call in the Macmillan team who may be able to help me in different ways. She said that we have tried the chemical route and now maybe it is time to make me more comfortable. I agreed with this course of action but was quite upset as I suppose I see this as the next stage. Is it really all going down hill from here?

I went up for my treatment on the chemo ward and chatted at length to Sarah, one of the chemo nurses. She suggested that if I didn't hear from a member of the Macmillan team by Monday that I was to give them a call and they would chase it for me.

Excrutiating pain in my back

I woke up Saturday morning with a pain in my back that I don't think I can say I've ever experienced. It was so painful that I couldn't even lift up the iron or kettle and has got progressively worse over the last 4 days. Today I've had to call out the doctor because I really can't move about very easily.

I'm trying all sorts of combinations of pain relief but not with much success. Paracetamol, diclofenec and either tramadol or morphine. The latter two however make me so drowsy that I can't do a lot. Luckily I've had a lot of help from friends with Freddie otherwise I don't think he'd be going to school!

The doctor and I think I've pulled a muscle through use of the crutches. Can't really think that it would be anything else. It's in my left shoulder blade area.

This is all really wearing me down and it's hard trying to remain strong.