Thanks for taking the time to visit my website. I'd like to tell you a little bit about myself. I'm a wife and mother of 3 young children, Matthew 13, Ellie 10 and Freddie 6. I was first diagnosed with Breast Cancer in 2001 at the age of 36. Following Chemotherapy and Radiotherapy, I was in remission until a chance MRI scan in Feb 2005 for an unrelated problem, detected that the Cancer had returned. I was then diagnosed with Secondary Breast Cancer. The likely prognosis given in February was 18 months to 5 years. I then had to undergo aggressive Chemotherapy, but following the results of a recent bone scan, it was found that the Cancer is still spreading.
The treatment in Germany will cost thousands of pounds and for most people like myself, the opportunity for this is a dream. Many of my Family and Friends want to make this dream a reality and are making tremendous fund raising efforts, because without them, I would not be able to seek the treatment that I so obviously need and which is not being offered in this country.
Wind Swept!
Not feeling too bad although my hair has started falling out big time. Went to a wedding reception this evening, it was very windy and when I got out of the car there was a great big gust of wind and I thought I was going to lose the whole lot, luckily I managed to retain enough to get me through the evening!
Scalp Hurting
Still not too good. Didn’t sleep well again last night. Head/scalp starting to hurt. I think it is a sign of my hair starting to fall out.
Stomach Bug
Feel so bad still, had to call out the GP. Think I may have a stomach bug. Just don’t know what to eat or drink. The chemo has reduced my white blood cells and therefore left me open to infection.
Don't think I could feel any worse!
Feel really bad today, nauseous, mouth feels disgusting, stomach cramps, legs ache and really hurt. Crying a lot tonight because my legs hurt so much. I think this must be a side effect of the Pamidronate, I only hope it doesn't happen every time.
The Dreaded Sickness
Starting to feel more sick and tired. I’ve got a sore throat and a yukky mouth. Everything is starting to taste disgusting. Even water!
Sleepless nights
Not feeling too bad although having problems sleeping. I’m waking up at 4 or 5 am and can’t get back to sleep. I think it is the Dexamethasone which I have to take during the first 3 days.
Taxotere chemo
First Taxotere chemo. Also had a PICC line put in. This will make it so much easier to administer the drugs as I had such a nightmare the last time with my elusive veins. The only downside to having the PICC line in is that I can’t go swimming and I have to wear a big plastic bag on my arm for bathing so that I don’t get the dressing wet.
Alongside the Taxotere I will be getting a drug called Pamidronate. This will mean that each visit to the hospital for this treatment will take at least 4 hours.
Had a bone scan today also, this is the first one I’ve had since 2001!
Liver Ultrasound
Liver ultrasound. All appears to be clear although the Consultant did say he saw a small spot on my liver which could be nothing. He said that if it was cancerous, it was small enough to be dealt with by the chemo. So it looks as if the cancer has only spread to the bones so far.
Shock and Despair!
Rang Oncologist's secretary again and she said she would have a quick word with the Onc and call me back. Within 20 minutes she called me back and said that I was to come in either this morning or Monday. Well I was in there straight away, I couldn’t wait over the weekend to find out what was going on.
Shock and despair are at least two words which come to mind. The cancer has returned in my spine, the prognosis is not good and I have to start chemo next week. All my hair is going to fall out, the cold cap won’t be of any use this time as the chemo is too aggressive. A bone scan has been booked for 10/2/05 and an appointment for a wig fitting on 9/2/05.
I feel as if it has really hit me hard this time. Everything feels like doom and gloom. Now I face the task of telling everyone.
No one seems to know anything!
Rang my Oncologist’s secretary to see if she could shed any light on the latest developments. She hadn’t seen any scan reports come through for my Oncologist to see and said that she would get back to me.
By the Way
Went back to see the Orthopaedic consultant, he went through the results of the scan and said that it wasn’t sciatica as first thought and that there wasn’t a problem with any discs. His final diagnosis was facet joint problems and therefore I would need cortisone injections. Then he said almost as a “by the way” comment, that the radiologists had seen some unusual black spots on my spine and as I had breast cancer previously he thought I should be referred back to my Oncologist to investigate this further. Then I was out the door before I could really digest the information and ask any questions.
